Back to Civilization! (well, sorta)

Ah... air conditioning...

Well, that was fun! We all had a fantastic time camping and have many great stories to tell. Well, one real good one, anyway. Maybe later. Actually, we're still recovering. Meaning we've got all these dishes, laundry, gear (un)packing, cleaning and (re)packing still to do. Why, I haven't even had time to read last week's comic haul! Which means I'm still missing out on seeing what the ramifications of having Ambush Bug back in the DC universe were. Or are still. Or something.

I'm still curious as to how he talked his way back into comics in the first place! That must've been some editorial meeting!

Really!

(Siskoid says he likes these AB quickies. I do too. So, why the hell not do another one?!?)

Twofer Wednesday

Going through an issue of Sports Illustrated a few weeks ago, I came across this little smile inducer in the letters section:

*Smirk*

If there's one group out there that could one-up the comic fanboys in their anal retentive attention to detail, it's the sports ones. If I didn't know any better, I'd say Mr. Hatlem was quite brilliant with his subtle dig there.

ITEM! Ambush Bug is back in the DC universe as of today! Happy Day! Tacos for everyone! Hide your socks! Tug on Superman's cape! Whoop Whoop!

In celebration of this joyous day, let's all be reminded of his tragic origin:



*sniff!*

*Ding!*

Random thought:

(Though, by God, it's a doozy!)

You know who should team up with Booster Gold in his "Criss-crossing the DC universe" time travel adventures? You know who should be in many, many issues of that series? You know who would bring that perfect touch of comedy while traipsing though the vast DC history?

This guy:

You want it, I want it.

You HEAR US GIFFEN?!?! Make it happen!!

We need him a lot 'cause we got 'em on the spot...

So, I'm sure you've all read about how DC is soon to bring back an old-time fan favorite from beyond the grave in a move that will surely please the few of us old fogies who actually remember reading his adventures as they happened as well as the bean crunchers who read the fanboy polls. Personally, I'm quite happy with his return and am really looking forward to all the monthly titles where he will be featured. Good job, DC. Works for me. In fact, I know a lot of us are really getting the gibblies just waiting for that first issue!

However, part of me kinda wishes they kept to their one-time word and the dead would remain dead. After all, it was one of the seminal deaths in all of comicdom .. I still remember getting chills when I read it for the first time, all those years ago. Man, whatta way to go out!

*Sigh*

Oh well. Glad he's back.

But let's all take a moment and reminisce, shall we? Took a bit of digging, but here's that amazing 1980s scene from the original Crisis:

Kinda chokes ya up, doesn't it?

(Aww.. C'mon! That one rocked!)
(Thanks, Siskoid, for saving me from doing the actual scan.)

The Green, the Bear, and the Hideously Scarred

Wowsers, was Jonah Hex ever good this week! As usual. It always is. Jus' sayin'.

And as a bonus - teasers to some of DC's upcoming projects were cleverly hidden throughout the issue!

See ...?

Man, I can't wait!

(Some scans lifted from Siskoid, a man who may actually be looking forward to AB's return more than me!)

Booster Gold, Revisited

Y'know? After finishing a second reading, the new Booster Gold 1st issue kinda grew on me. I think Kevin nailed down my initial problem with it when he described it as an 80s throwback. Or homage. I can't decide. But it sure did have some typical-for-the-time formulaic writing and set-up at the beginning. As fun as they tried to make it. But it still left a bad taste in my mouth.

I've now noticed that it's only the first half of the comic that reads like those old 80s Booster Golds. Still, it kinda bugged me, I admit, and I actually put it down before that point thinking it's traveling too far downhill for it to make it worthwhile to finish. I'm glad I picked it up again. It totally redeems itself in the last half.

(And that Superboy "Punching history. Please." joke was teh awesome! That one was, too.)

So, I kinda like it now. And the premise is a good one to carry a series. I'll probably pick up the next one. It still makes me feel like I'm a 18 year-old comics reader again, though...

Enough with the breakdown! Time for some crappy photoshop!

Click for Boost
And, was I the only one who thought, after hearing this sound effect:

That this would follow?

Perhaps I've just been reading too much Ambush Bug recently. Like that's even possible.

Acquired: DC Comics Presents #81

Price: $3.00
Where: Arch Enemy Comics, Boise, ID

I was recently re-reading my already-owned copy of this particular issue when I noticed a small tear on the back page that made me sad. It meant that I had to get another copy, and so I immediately put it on the list. Normally, I wouldn't bother picking up a spare copy of a practically valueless mid-80s comic that I already own in decent shape aside from a small tear. But with this one, I felt I needed to keep a extra, more flawless copy handy. It's special to me. Two copies would be nice.

Why?

Writer and Artist: Keith Giffin

Because it's the single greatest Ambush Bug story ever told!

And by the end of this, you'll agree!

The hi jinx's start with our intrepid protagonist enjoying a quiet round of golf. Well, considering that it's Ambush Bug we're talking about, "quiet" means plowing through the course and other players like a whirling dervish while making loud "Whoop! Whoop!" noises. After he slices his ball into the drink, he grabs his snorkel, dives in, and finally chips it into the hole!

He pops his way to the jewelery store where he has the "rare glowing gem" set into a necklace as a present for someone he recently had a falling out with.

(Superfriends Narrator Voice)

Meanwhile, at the Fortress of Solitude...

Superman is honing his punching skills with a game of Bombardment Ball. (Hey, it's in bold in the comic!) Being Superman, he can't be expected to do it the easy way though, and is just about to reach a blindfolded new high score when who-know-who pops in:

And that, dear readers, is a set-up and premise that would make me shoot bourbon spiked coffee out of my nose and onto Mr. Giffin were I in the pitch room.

After Superman (Ambush Bug) explains the situation to Ambush Bug (Superman), he (Ambush Bug .. I mean Superman .. I mean.. oh, nevermind!) decides that the world still needs a Superman and blasts off to continue the never-ending quest of defending truth, justice, and cream pies, despite his total ineptitude with the powers and leaving Superman (forget it!) stuck in the Fortress.

(Superfriends Narrator Voice)

Back in Metropolis, forty-four hours later...

...Kobra is after the secret to Ambush Bug's teleportation suit and tracks him to his detective agency:


Koko makes a quick exit leaving AB to wrap up a very lucrative Frank Miller deal. After a bit of thought, he figures out that the mysterious, bald stranger who just beat a hasty retreat had to be none other than Lex Luthor! And the chase is on!

(Superfriends Nar... aww.. you get it already!)

Meanwhile, back at the Fortress of Solitude...


Meanwhile...

Notice, if you will, Kobra's signal device: "Why.. Why.. Why..." That's funny, right there.

Meanwhile...


Ambush Bug eventually smacks into Kobra and proceeds to set fire to the entire waterfront when he figures out how his heat vision works. Kobra is seriously scared after concluding that Superman has gone crazy and breaks for his ark:

Meanwhile... Back at the Fortress of Solitude... Superman, stuck in Ambush Bug's body, tries to learn the secret to the suit's teleportation...


Soon after, the 48 hour Red Kryptonite effect wears off and our players switch bodies back again to the way things were. Superman (the real one now) lets Kobra get away in order to deal with the waterfront fire. Ambush Bug pops back to help just as Supes is creating a tidal wave to deal with the fire.

What follows this panel is probably the best in-joke splash page ever to see print. Not to be spoiled here. Go buy it yourself.

The story ends with a funny little wrap-up that leaves Superman in hysterics and Kobra plotting a course outside of the DC universe. Seriously.

I've read this issue at least 50 times since I bought it way back when it originally came out. Now I have two copies and can read and re-read my original torn one until I finally read it to tatters. I may do that.. it makes me laugh every time. I credit this particular comic with starting my love for wacky silver-age funny book craziness, which to this day still hangs on me like a Red Kryptonite necklace. Recommended.

*Pop!*

Happy Friday!

---

No, it makes no sense aside from making me laugh. Enjoy the genius that was my last joke, why don't you! I'm in a very giggly mood because today it's FRIDAY! and I'm off to bring some mandolin goodness to a local band that needs some. So, it's a quickie. I have things to do!

Plus, I will be in no state to post anything coherent later tonight. I could probably muster some late night babbling and drooling, though. And I might just be able to find the bed. Or the toilet. No promises. I've played with these guys before.

Have fun, kiddies!

Bonus Update: Everybody Loves Ambush Bug!

Why the hell not:

Like me, you would buy any 4th World / Ambush Bug crossover. You know you would.

Creepy Secret, Redux!

Sometimes an idea hits me while just going through other people's creativity.

Rachelle over at Living Between Wednesdays (a personal favorite comic blogs of mine, by the way) had a very funny write up of Lois Lane #89. Go read it. It's funny. I'll wait.

See? Told you it was funny!

Anyway, my favorite panel from the comic / post was this one:

I stared at that panel for a long time. How could I not? It's awesome! How creepy can Bruce get? And more importantly, can I kick the funny up a notch with some bad photoshop editing?

Hmmm... A shrine to Supergirl? Mary Marvel? ... nah.. not funny, just underage creepy. Superman? Too easy. Pied Piper? Too obscure. Catwoman? Too obvious. And not funny. James Gordon? Hmmm.. almost! Bat-Mite? Getting warmer...

Wait! I've got it!


Tee hee.

When in doubt, pull out the Ambush Bug! Always money.

Shocking Origin Issue!

So after seeing Spider-man 3 (a mixed bag, but overall a pretty enjoyable popcorn movie) and reading Mike's post I started to think about super-hero origins. Specifically, which ones of the "classics" honestly hold up after all these years, actually make logical sense, and more importantly, are good, solid well-thought out bits of characterization.

Mike's post pointed out the big three that fit all of the above (Batman, Superman, and Spider-man), and I absolutely agree. Those are probably the best - they all still make sense (with minimal modern revising), they're all solid writing and all firmly establish the characters; all of their traits, faults, and personalities are laid out right there at the beginning.

(As an aside, I agree with Mike that this movie so completely botched - with a retcon - Spider-man's origin. Completely sucked all of Peter's guilt out of it. In fact, absolved him of it, to a degree. And Spider-man without guilt is like Batman without Joe Chill. Oh, wait...)

But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that there are very few big ticket super-heroes with origins that still work today. And make sense. Let's go through a few of them:

- Fantastic Four - All kinds of problems have cropped up since the years we learned that simply leaving Earth's atmosphere will not give you super powers, despite the Incredible Diaper-Lady. The modernization of the gawd-awful movie made it even worse, and I didn't think that was possible. The best re-vamp I' ve seen was how they handled it in the Ultimate universe. Keep it on Earth, make it a different Reed experiment (attempting to send an object into another dimensional plane), and include Doom. And make it Doom's secret mathmatical correction that causes it to explode in their faces. And don't ever let him believe that. Completely OK with that one.

- Wonder Woman - Tricky. Which one are we talking about? Personally, I like the classic one, slightly adapted like they did with the Justice League cartoon. Greek Amazons, contest to decide man's world representative, princess wins despite being forbidden to enter, given sacred artifact weapons, etc. etc. This should be fairly easy to translate to the screen, whenever the hell the movie gets written. But this one is soooo easy to botch up. Badly.

- Captain America - I don't see why this one wouldn't work just as it is. I'm willing to keep the one time only super soldier serum, the suspended animation, and the indestructible shield. Yes, keep this one just as it is, please. And for God's Sake, please have him behave as if he was actually from (hard to believe) the 1940's! I don't think we're going to see that bit translate well.

- Green Lantern - Don't mind this one, either. As long as it sticks to the "crash landed alien choses successor with last dying action to serve in the Universal Police Force" theme and Hal (yes, Hal) simply has Earth as one part of the vast responsibilities in his sector. That setup lends itself so well to any bit of good writing - you've got a whole universe worth of crime drama right there. Probably the best setup - if you're thinking about sequels - in the bunch. But, and I'm thinking Hollywood here, I shudder to think of how many ways this can be screwed with. Think (Jack) about (Black) it. Ugggh.

- Iron Man - From all the press, I've got a decent idea how they're going to go with this one, and I've always been a bit bothered by it, even though it's pretty spot on to the original. I like the idea that Tony creates a device to keep him alive while imprisoned out of spare junk. Man's a genius. But, when you go from that to building a suit of war-armor out of that same junk.. not so much. It would be much better, I've always thought, if Tony fixes (temporallary) his heart condition, then builds something more simplistic - like a laser gauntlet and a shield - that allows him to escape and gives him the idea for the real suit once back at Stark Industries. He makes the suit there, then starts with the ass-kicking. Simple device out of junk while imprisoned just to escape; big ass machine once back at the place that could actually build it. I know I'm splitting hairs with the Mark I (prison) - Mark III (Stark Labs) armor thing, but I think that even the Mark I armor shouldn't have been built under those conditions. Keep it simple at first.

- Hulk - This one's a classic, but it needed tweaking almost as soon as it came out. And all you have to do is move from a bomb to a lab. Fine by me. You can even have that wacky intern Rick Jones screw it up somehow.

- X-Men - Mutants. Who cares? Probably the laziest origin of the bunch. But it holds up pretty well.

- Ambush Bug - You don't mess with perfection. I'm looking at you, Hollywood! And you better get James Earl Jones to be the voice of Argh!Yle! in the movie. Or Gilbert Gottfried.

Whoops! Got stuck dreaming out loud there again! Laters!

(Heroes night tonight! Yay!)

Greatest Team-Ups Ever

Tell me this idea wouldn't rock. In some strange universal DC cross-over event thingee. Somewhere where wacky fun and hard-core violence collide...

Click to biggify. Really, this time. Honest.

I'm going to let this one lie right there. But no one alive can deny that a Jonah Hex / Ambush Bug team up would be Nine Shades of Awesome.

Seriously.

EDIT: I just noticed that clicking the image doesn't make it all that much bigger. I'm a dummy. I can't fix it while I'm at work, but if you open it with Windows picture viewer, the zoom works pretty well. I'll fix it later tonight.

EDIT x2: Seems I didn't have Photobucket's uploading options set to allow big pics. Fixed it. Now with big clicky image goodness!

EDIT x3: Sorry, but adding the antennas was just too funny to pass up. I should've thought of it earlier. But I'm slow like that. Takes me an hour to cook Minute Rice, y'know...

If Only

Slight post today - too busy to do anything more indepth. But just to post something..

Personally, I would be delighted if at this time next year all of the buildup surrounding DC's Countdown finally leads to a series' finale page like this:

Tell me that wouldn't be the best ending to a Big-Two build-up series ever. Seriously.

EDIT: Wow, I miss stupid spelling errors every post. My bad.