Buy! Buy! Buy!

Whew! It's over 100 degrees here, and it will be for the rest of the week. Remind me why I moved to a desert again? Ummm.. dessert... that reminds me - I have Popsicles! Back in a flash!

*one quick trip to the freezer later*

Sorry about the lack of post on Friday - I was abducted and forced into a bar against my will. Not a pole bar mind you, but the kind of bar where you get outrageously inebriated among total strangers then try to sleep with them. Well, it's all sorted out and now that she's finally left (and I've sobered up), I'm free to continue with another stupid comic book musing. In Blog form!

So, without any further delay, let's have a l'il perusal of DC's October shipping list, hmmm?

COUNTDOWN 30-26

I've decided just this week that I'm dropping Countdown. It's really not doing anything for me and I don't read enough of the mainstream DC books you need to read to make sense of this thing. I really had high hopes for this, but after 10 issues, I really can't justify anything further. That said, I will probably read it in the store just to keep familiar with what DC's doing for the next year. Shame, though.

COUNTDOWN TO MYSTERY #2
COUNTDOWN TO ADVENTURE #3
COUNTDOWN SPECIAL: THE FLASH 80-PAGE GIANT
COUNTDOWN PRESENTS: LORD HAVOK AND THE EXTREMISTS #1
COUNTDOWN PRESENTS THE SEARCH FOR RAY PALMER: CRIME SYNDICATE #1

Reason #143-147 why I'm dropping Countdown. I hate these marketing tie-ins, and I'm not buying anything Countdown related on general principle. This time, I mean it. Really.

(Unless the Fourth World books look good. I'm a sucker for fourth world stuff.)

DETECTIVE COMICS #837
Written by Paul Dini
Art by Don Kramer & Wayne Faucher
Cover by Simone Bianchi

This special issue of DETECTIVE COMICS features two of Gotham's recently reformed rogues: Harley Quinn and the Riddler! Readers who have enjoyed Harley's role in COUNTDOWN will take special pleasure in this story as they learn how she became involved in the Amazonian Women's Help Center.

I'll still buy this though, Mr. Dini. You have my faith when writing these two characters, both of which you obviously love even more than I do.

And as an aside, if I may? Mr. Dini? Just between you and me?...

(You totally have the lovely Mrs. Dini dress up in the Harley costume every once an a while, don't you? You can tell me...)

*ponders for a minute*

OK, I'm back!

BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS #1
Written by Tony Bedard
Art by Koi Turnbull & Art Thibert
Cover by Turnbull
Variant Cover by Ryan Sook
Tony Bedard (BIRDS OF PREY, COUNTDOWN) and Koi Turnbull (Fathom) launch a bold new direction for the DCU's misfit heroes! The rules have changed all over the DC Universe - but for the Outsiders, they're still just things that were made to be broken!
It's a fresh game of dirty pool for the Outsiders as the Dark Knight sends his new team to the frontlines of a massive assault on metahumans. Batman and the Outsiders must fight even dirtier than their enemies...and risk becoming the supervillains they despise!

Y'know? It seems like the only thing harder than an acceptable Doom Patrol series run is an Outsiders one. Or a Creeper. But, hope springs eternal, I suppose.

And something I just noticed?

J'onn J'onzz is a skrull. Jus' saying. But it explains a lot...

DEATH OF THE NEW GODS #1-2
Written by Jim Starlin
Art and covers by Starlin & Matt Banning
Variant cover issue #1 by Ryan Sook
The title says it all! For months now readers have witnessed the unimaginable and unthinkable as New Gods across the DCU have seemingly died, with Lightray's death in COUNTDOWN the biggest of them all. Now, the carnage continues but the mystery and adventure is just beginning! Jim Starlin - master of the cosmic odyssey - writes and illustrates this epic tale of death and destruction on a scale never seen before. With a cast of hundreds and cameos by the entire DCU, this intergalactic 8-part series cannot be missed!

Yeah, they're gonna sucker me in on this one. I'm dreading the final outcome, though.

My big problem is that so few writers actually "get" the fourth world and an even lesser number can write a decent story around it. Starlin, in theory, could do this. But I shudder at DC's collective idea as to how the fourth world should fit in with their new design. Part of me says nothing good can come of this, the other part is just hoping against hope. And springing Eternals.

(That's a pun, there.. See, The Eternals were Kirby's Marvel version of .. oh, never mind!)

CRIME BIBLE: THE FIVE LESSONS OF BLOOD #1
GOTHAM UNDERGROUND #1
INFINITY INC. #2
BLACK ADAM: THE DARK AGE #3
52 AFTERMATH: THE FOUR HORSEMEN #3

Again: general principle, squeezing the reader's nickels, massive tie in aftermath = not buying.

TALES OF THE SINESTRO CORPS PRESENTS: THE ANTI-MONITOR #1
TALES OF THE SINESTRO CORPS PRESENTS: CYBORG SUPERMAN #1

Same thing with these. Though I might flip through them.

BATMAN #670
Written by Grant Morrison
Art and cover by Tony Daniel
The next chapter of Batman's life starts here! The shadow of Batman's archfoe Ra's al Ghul still looms large over the head of the Dark Knight. Is Ra's al Ghul destined to live again? Batman begins his quest for the truth in this special prelude to "The Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul," guest-starring Talia al Ghul, Damian, the Sensei and I-Ching!

Morrison possibly bringing us a Ra's al Ghul story?

Please?!?

BATMAN CONFIDENTIAL #10
Written by Michael Green
Art and cover by Denys Cowan & John Floyd

This is where it happens: the birth of the Joker! Discover exactly what Batman's involvement was in the creation of unfettered evil!

Once again ... Please don't do a Joker origin story!! No matter how good you think it's going to be, it will not work at best and could possibly kill the character for future possibilities at worst. He works better set against the unknown. Trust me on this one, guys.

ACTION COMICS #857

OK, that's just plain genius there. Great cover.

And I will buy it simply for that reason.

JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA #10

Nice to see that Alex Ross has found a way around that whole "Steel Package" thing.

SUPERGIRL AND THE LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES #35

Zombie Lightning Lad!!! Gah!!

THE SPIRIT #11

Good Grief, but that's one helluva eye-catching cover! Phenomenal job, Mr. Cooke!

SHOWCASE PRESENTS: SUICIDE SQUAD VOL. 1 TP
Written by John Ostrander, Keith Giffen, J.M. DeMatteis and others
Art by Howard Chaykin, Karl Kesel, Luke McDonnell and others
From the 1980s comes this hard-hitting volume collecting the popular series in which captured super-villains got the chance to leave prison behind?for a price. Included are storied from Suicide Squad #1-18, Doom Patrol and Suicide Squad Special #1, SECRET ORIGINS #14 and Justice League International #13.

Thanks, DC. It's about freckin' time, though! I will always regret selling off my full collection of this series so many years ago. Thanks for the second chance.

DC MINIMATES

One guess as to which pair I'll be getting. At long last.. Oh, the hi-jinx that will ensue...

WOMEN OF THE DC UNIVERSE SERIES 2: STARFIRE BUST

So .... how long until we get one of those "deluxe" posable action figures of Starfire with removable clothing, a la Power Girl?

Jus' Sayin; You know it's coming.

---

Well, that's enough for now. Time to walk the doggies and water the burn spots on the lawn. And get another Popsicle. I think I'll go with the "blue" flavor....

Brief Future Looks

Normally when the new monthly solicitations come out, I'll do a little writeup on what looks good / begs to be made fun of. This month however, there have been enough good ones already that I'm just going to touch on a few things of interest to probably no one but myself:

THE BLACK CANARY WEDDING PLANNER
JLA WEDDING SPECIAL #1
THE GREEN ARROW/BLACK CANARY WEDDING SPECIAL #1

Yeah, this thing is going to be a frenzy. Normally, I'd think this was going too far overboard, and going to get well out of hand... but then again, it is a big-name wedding, and like a real life wedding.. these things tend to snowball out of control. I'll look at it that way, and enjoy the irony.

THE QUESTION: ZEN AND VIOLENCE VOL. 1 TP
Written by Dennis O'Neil
Art by Denys Cowan & Rick Magyar
Cover by Cowan & Bill Sienkiewicz
A new trade paperback collecting the 1980s adventures of The Question, the faceless, morally conflicted avenger based in corrupt Hub City! A martial arts master, The Question delved into Eastern philosophy as he battled crime and the crooked politicians of his hometown. This volume, collecting issues #1-6, features appearances by Batman and many of DC's martial arts heroes.
Advance-solicited; on sale October 3 o 176 pg, FC, $19.99 US

Hell, yeah! I already own the complete series, but I'll be picking this up just to have a handy reading copy. The Denny O'Neil / Denys Cowan Question (Rama Kushna rest his soul) is just plain incredible. And if you don't think so... well, you're a poopy-head, Mr. Poopy-Head!

BATMAN #669
Written by Grant Morrison
Art and cover by J.H. Williams III
Concluding a 3-part story by Grant Morrison and J.H. Williams III! Batman's reunion with the Club of Heroes turns into a deathtrap as Robin and the Squire are kidnapped by the Black Glove! And with the Club of Villains lurking in the shadows, can good possibly triumph?
On sale September 12 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

This can be nothing short of fantastic. And, boy! Does Morrison love the Squire, or what?!

(Can't say I blame him.)

JLA/HITMAN #1
Written by Garth Ennis
Art and Cover by John McCrea
Tommy Monaghan, the long-lost hero of HITMAN, returns in part one of this two-issue miniseries! There's a problem on the JLA moonbase, and not even the World's Greatest Heroes can cope by themselves. Can Tommy help them out? Will he? Unpleasant secrets from the past return...on the Darkside.
On sale September 19 o 1 of 2 o 48 pg, FC, $3.99 US

OK! Now we're talking! This has so much potential to live up to in my head that I think I can only be let down. Then again... Ennis writes the Justice League? That alone is worth the cost, right there.

DEATHBLOW #7
Written by Brian Azzarello
Art and cover by Carlos D'Anda
At war not with just the enemy but with his allies, Deathblow finds himself challenged for the title of "World's Deadliest Man." The challenger is less than a man - but more than human! Half machine, half dinosaur - 100% Osamasaurus!
On sale September 26 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

OK, normally I would have zero interest in this. In fact, I really just glossed over the synopsis.

But... I happen to catch the phrase, "Osamasaurus: Half Machine, Half Dinosaur!" ...and, well brother?! You might have just huckstered yourself a sale there!

---

Finally, simply because it occurred to me as I was perusing the solicit, and because it was fairly easy to do... I give you a brand-new Cover Collision!

BLUE BEETLE #19
+
SUPERMAN #667
=

These things are just obvious sometimes...

Solicitations! Buy Their Crap!

Hey kids! Let's have a li'l gander into DC's August solicitations (courtesy of CBR), shall we? (click on that link for bigger pictures than I'm posting here, if they interest you. Like if you want Power Girl boobie closeups, or whatnot) It was fun last time! Wheee!

First off, I can't help but notice that there's no All Star Batman and Robin entry. I'm shocked. Shocked. And stunned.

I know I shouldn't, but I like that cover. I think it's the whole Zatanna / Mary / Stage Magic dynamic. I'm a sucker for those two characters. And a top hat scene. It's drawn real purty, too.

But, Good Googly-Moogly!, is that ever a short skirt, Mary!!

COUNTDOWN TO ADVENTURE #1
Written by Adam Beechen and Justin Gray
Art by Eddy Barrows, Fabrizio Fiorentino & Julio Ferreira
Cover by Ivan Reis & Oclair Albert
Flying out of the pages of 52, it's Adam Strange, Starfire and Animal Man in an explosive new series! Now that they've returned to their respective homes, where do they go from here? Find out what the future holds for these heroes in the DCU!
And in the 8-page backup, from the pages of COUNTDOWN, it's a tale of Forerunner! Find out more about this awesome new character and her relationship with the Monitors.
On sale August 29 o 1 of 8 o 48 pg, FC, $3.99 US Edited by Eddie Berganza

Let the unnecessary big event cross-overs ... Begin!

And Devon has it right - keep Starfire in space, team her up with Adam Strange and make her DC comic's Barbarella. That sounds about right to me.

ALL-NEW BOOSTER GOLD #1
Written by Geoff Johns & Jeff Katz
Art and cover by Dan Jurgens
& Norm Rapmund
Exploding from the pages of 52 and exploring the timeline of the DC Universe comes a new monthly book featuring the greatest super-hero history will never know: Booster Gold!
Following the universe altering conclusion of 52, Booster Gold wants what's due to him - a spot on the Justice League of America! But the time stream's in trouble, and Booster Gold is in the center of it! Now he must make a choice: reclaim his former glory or do the right thing, forgoing the credit.
ALL-NEW Booster Gold will take you through time and space, to the greatest moments of the DCU that have happened and will happen.
"52 Pick-Up" begins in this extra-sized issue #1! Someone is exploiting the ravaged time stream, hoping to eliminate the world's greatest heroes - and only Booster Gold can stop them. But, really - Booster Gold? Why him? What does Rip Hunter truly want? And what shocking figure is behind it all?
And coming up in the months ahead in DC's time spanning monthly: the world's greatest Green Lantern - Sinestro, Jonah Hex, Barbara "Batgirl" Gordon, Flash and Kid Flash, and plenty more of DC's super stars from throughout its past and future!
For a signed edition, please see the Dynamic Forces section of Previews.
On sale August 15 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US Edited by Michael Siglain

I'm thinking this could be great. Heck, this could be fantastic. It's a great concept, and it could function to let the readers explore the new DC universe in a very clever way.

But, I'm real wary about it. It could just as easily do a lot of damage. Wait and see...

OUTSIDERS: FIVE OF A KIND - WEEKS 1-5:
NIGHTWING/BOOMERANG
KATANA/SHAZAM
THUNDER/MARTIAN MANHUNTER
METAMORPHO/AQUAMAN
GRACE/WONDER WOMAN

Get ready for FIVE OF A KIND - five issues, five top creative teams, one team-up per week, as Batman takes control of the Outsiders by using these adventures to pick his new lineup!

If ever there was a gimmicky series... here ya go. Wow. The gimmicky-esque gimmick to ever mick a gimm. (HaHa! That one was for me!) Weekly team-ups, different talent, pulling from the previous big company gimmick, an all-Batman tie in, with the end result creating a new series? I'm suprised there's no 1-900 number for readers to call in and vote.

BATMAN ANNUAL #26: HEAD OF THE DEMON
Written by Peter Milligan
Art by David Lopez & Alvaro Lopez
Cover by Tim Sale
The definitive origin of Ra's al Ghul, Batman's greatest foe, is finally revealed in this annual from writer Peter Milligan (JLA CLASSIFIED, X-Static) and the art team of David Lopez & Alvaro Lopez (CATWOMAN)! A deadly rivalry between two immortals spanning more than 400 years of history causes a chain reaction that not even Batman could have predicted! Learn how the secret past of this legendary villain has a reverberating effect on the future of the Dark Knight.
On sale August 29 o 48 pg, FC, $3.99 US Edited by Jeanine Schaefer

*Sigh* I know I've mentioned this before, but with some characters It's better not to know the origin, despite how popular they've become! Jeez, people! Some characters just work better with that mystique: Joker, Wolverine, (and Mystique, come to think of it.. heh), Phantom Stranger, and absolutely, definitely, Freckin' Ra's al Ghul! Gah!

SUPERMAN #666
Written by Kurt Busiek
Art and cover by Walter Simonson
An extra-sized spectacular featuring art by Walter Simonson, as Superman goes to Hell - literally - during the most nightmarish adventure of his heroic career, and a dread portent of that which may be coming! Who, or what, is "The Beast from Krypton"? This issue - featuring the Phantom Stranger, Zatanna, the Demon and a host of other DC superstars from Wonder Woman to Animal Man - is guaranteed to send chills down your spine!
For a signed edition, please see the Dynamic Forces section of Previews.
On sale August 8 o 48 pg, FC, $3.99 US

I believe I'll be getting this one, even though I normally don't get Superman titles. Except for that one. It'll nicely bookend my upcoming Batman #666. Plus, it has the Phantom Stranger, Zatanna, and Animal Man - three of my favorite characters. And that Walt Simonson cover is creepy as hel.. opps.. heck.

SUPERMAN CONFIDENTIAL #7
Written by Jimmy Palmiotti & Justin Gray
Art and cover by Koi Turnbull & Sandra Hope
An early adventure of Superman from art sensation Koi Turnbull (Black Panther, Fathom) and the writing team of Jimmy Palmiotti & Justin Gray! The fate of Metropolis is at stake when Superman gets mixed up with Lori Lemaris!
On sale August 29 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

DC mentions two rival companies as the previous works from Koi Turnbull. It might be just because those are the only two you can mention, or might be his best works. I don't know. But, I seem to have noticed that Marvel does not do this. I might be wrong, but I can't think of an example of Marvel giving a credit that involved a DC book. Hmmm...

52: THE COVERS HC

Does anyone buy these? I mean, people must or it wouldn't be here, but isn't this just a coffee table book for friends and relatives that won't understand it at all? Sure, there's some great covers here.. but is there actually a market for a Hard Cover book full of funnybook covers? Just askin'

THE FLASH: THE FASTEST MAN ALIVE #15
Written by Marc Guggenheim
Art by Tony S. Daniel & Art Thibert
Cover by Doug Braithwaite
Variant cover by Daniel Acuña
Continuing the storyline so explosive we can't give anything away - and it's destined to be one of the most talked-about tales of 2007!
Retailers please note: This issue will ship with two covers in approximately 50/50 ratio. Standard Edition A features a cover by Doug Braithwaite, while Standard Edition B features a cover by Daniel Acuña. Please see the Previews Order Form for more information.
Fans: Remind your retailer early and often to order you a copy!
On sale August 15 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

Barry Allen Alert!

Wouldn't it be a great inside joke if this book was late?!

(Only people reading a comics blog will laugh at that. Trust me, though. It's funny.)

GREEN ARROW/BLACK CANARY: FOR BETTER OR WORSE TP
BLACK CANARY ARCHIVES VOL. 1 HC
GREEN ARROW: YEAR ONE #3-4
BLACK CANARY #3-4

Is this because of the wedding thing? That's a lot of GA/BC action there. I'm assuming it includes that awkward torture/rape scene in Green Arrow. I forget which issue that was in.

But a Diggle/Jock Green Arrow series.. hmmm... Might get that one.

That's a real fun cover, there. Really pulls you in.

I used to own every individual comic contained in these trades.

Used to.

I'm with Rachelle on this one- Please, please DC... Make this into a poster. I'll give you a foot massage....

Yes, I will be buying this. Oh, yes. That's a thing of beauty, right there.

Likewise, I may pick this one up just based on that cover, though I don't normally get the DC Cartoon stuff.. But, man! That's a wicked funny cover idea! Tell me you don't want to read what happens in that funnybook!

Whoo, boy! Ummm... There really is a market for these things. The terrorists have already won.

Still.. get a toy robot, a rubber octopus, and a little bit of string for bondage... you've got yourself some Hentai action fun!

Oh, God.. too much comedy ... Ack... Overload!... Brain hurts...

OK, got it. Think I'm going to go with this:

*Ahem!*

DC Toy Dept: We've got this great idea for a 13" Power Girl Deluxe!
DC Exec: Really? Sounds good! PG always sells to the fanboys! Gonna make her teh sexay?!?
DC Toy Dept: Oh, you bet! Fully articulated.. know what I mean? Nudge Nudge...
DC Exec: Nice geek reference! OK, I'm sold - what do we charge? $20?!?
DC Toy Dept: Did we mention that Power Girl's wearing an actual fabric costume over her nude plastic body?
DC Exec: ....
DC Exec: ....
DC Toy Dept: It's removable....
DC Exec: ....
DC Exec: ....
DC Toy Dept: Classic easy-fanboy-access Peek-A-Boo Cleavage Window....
DC Exec: ............. Umm.. OK ... Sorry 'bout that. *whew* OK... (Did I mention that I love you guys?) OK... I'm thinking $50!
DC Toy Dept: Did we also mention that she's "Realistically Proportioned?!?"
DC Exec: Ding Ding!!! $70!!!

That said.. I want one. I'm shallow like that.

And I know .... KNOW ... that if I bought one there would be someone in the LCS asking if I would take it out of the box before I leave to "look at it."

Yes. That would happen.

Me Solicit. Me am Soliciting!

I'm not really soliciting anything, it's just Bizarro-Speak. Clever, huh? Anyway, just for giggles (and because I haven't prepared a proper post. I blame TiVo. And the Dr. Who marathon. and beer. Lovely, lovely beer.), let's go through a few things on DC's July solicitations...

---

BATMAN #668
Written by Grant Morrison
Art and cover by J.H. Williams III
Batman, Robin and the Club of Heroes are stuck on an island rigged with elaborate death traps. And even as the villain behind it all begins to explain his twisted motives, he continues to pick the heroes off one by one.
On sale July 25 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

Y'know? Morrison does Murderworld could be really, really fun. Of course it's also the kind of story he could write in his sleep. I'm hoping for the former.

---

This picture beautifully encapsulates my personal torment over All-Star Batman and Robin. I honestly can't decide if this is a pop-art, over-the-top for over-the-top's sake piece of utter creative brilliance that was probably making Frank Miller laugh manically with glee even as he was drawing it ... or if it's crap. I can't judge it. I don't get it. But... part of me - a part deep, deep down in the lower areas of my mind.. the bit that I inherited from evolution's genetic programming that either tells me to be awe-struck by something unknown or to flee in terror .... that part of me kind of likes it.

The comic is the same way with me. I wish I could go all in, yelling "Fuck Yeah!" at the manly man-ness that he's going for here.. but I usually just read it with a big ol' question mark over my head. Yet for $6 a year, I'll keep reading it. I can budget quixotic surreality in at that price.

---

BATMAN CONFINDENTIAL #7
Written by Michael Green
Art and cover by Denys Cowan & John Floyd
What kind of person becomes a Joker? Writer Michael Green (Heroes writer/producer) and classic Batman artist Denys Cowan shed light on who the Joker was before he became the Joker?and how he and Batman crossed paths even before the day he was created.
On sale July 11 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

Please, comic writers. Please listen to me. PLEASE!! This one's easy. You ready? Pay attention:

With some characters, not knowing the backstory is actually a good thing!
I didn't want to know Wolverine's origin, and damn well didn't want him to get his memory back. I don't want to know the Joker's backstory any more than I already do. They are better characters when the reader doesn't know. It actually adds depth, not hides it. Remember Phantom Stranger? There's a reason he's hands-off as far as origin goes. He works better when he's an unknown. Let the Joker begin with Alan Moore and stop going backwards. He's supposed to be enigmatic, dammit!

Argh! Next thing you know, we'll have an Iwrin Schwab adventure from before he was Ambush Bug. And on that day my friends, the terrorists will have won.

'Course that said, this is drawn by Denys Cowan, so I'll probably buy it. I'm shallow like that.

Incidentially, isn't it spelled "Confidential?" It'll be a hoot if it's that way on the cover.

---

BATMAN: SECRETS OF THE BATCAVE TP
Written by Bill Finger, Dennis O'Neil and others
Art by Bob Kane, Sheldon Moldoff and others Cover by various
Step into the Batcave in this new collection spanning Batman's career! Featuring stories from BATMAN #12, 35, 48, 109 and 348, DETECTIVE COMICS #158, 186, 205, 233, 235, and 244, WORLD'S FINEST #30, BRAVE AND THE BOLD #182, BIZARRO COMICS #244, and SECRET ORIGINS TP, this volume features the finest stories set in the mysterious lair of the Dark Knight!
Advance-solicited; on sale August 29 o 192 pg, FC, $17.99 US

Yes, please. Oh, yes. Nice price, too.

---

+ (331° rotation + colors) - Supergirl =

I'm Jus' Sayin'

---

JACK OF FABLES #13
Written by Bill Willingham & Matthew Sturges
Art by Tony Akins & Andrew Pepoy
Cover by CLASSIFIED
Jack's been impaled by the sword Excalibur, and only the One True King can remove it from him. But where is he, and how long can Jack last with a sword sticking out of his chest?
On sale July 25 o 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US o MATURE READERS

OK. Lemme take a stab at this one (Hah! I slay me!). I'll guess that the thing pinning Jack to the stone on that cover is... ummm... that it's some kind of stabby thing... ummm, from a king ... piercing stabby weapon ... Royalty ...

OK, I'm gonna go with... Aquman in the parlor with a Harpoon! Curse you Aquaman and your Fable-stabbing ways!

And if that cover is indeed drawn by Brian Bolland, then this is officially the worst kept cover "CLASSIFIED" solicitation I've ever seen.

---

Hmmm.. I kind of like this one. Something really draws the eye... can't quite put my finger on it, but I feel my line of vision strangely pulled towards something. It's hypnotic, almost mesmerizing...

Oh well. Maybe it'll boobies to me later.

---

Gah! Ack! Make it stop! Nononononono....

---

Well, that was fun! Maybe I'll do these more often! Now excuse me while I go watch some Supergirl Justice League Unlimited episodes to scrub the Super-Porno-Girl image out of my head. Honestly, does that thing above look like it would be relaxing in a towel, sipping hot cocoa with "Babs," high fiving each other because they just made the news? Then laughing playfully as a casual touch becomes oh so much more when you're young and innocent. Then a knock at the door as Mary Marvel enters wearing only a ...

Umm.. Forget I said that. I don't want to be responsible for anyone building a scenario around that. Or worse, writing some fan-fiction. *shudder*

(Boom-Chicka Wow-Wow!)